Troubles in Paradise

Ok, let’s be real.

I am struggling a bit. I have barely done any Happy Heart work since I left Argentina last month. I have felt uninspired, lazy, and self indulgent. And the last thing I feel able to do is provide value to the Happy Heart Community. How can I offer inspiration when I am feeling so uninspired?

But what I am realizing is that I do not have to be the perfect model of inspiration and happiness all the time. And it is sometimes in the struggle to find truth and happiness that we can connect and relate on another level. 

For me, the past month has been wonderful and challenging all at the same time. I am basically on vacation, spending time with family, visiting friends, and eating all the delicious food that exists in the US. Not too shabby, right?

On the flip side, I am having trouble keeping up with my personal practices. I don’t have the amount of alone time that I am used to and a lot of my practices thrive on alone time. Part of it is due to the fact that we are traveling from place to place, living with family and staying with friends the whole time. The other part is my own lack of motivation and even guilt for taking time away from family.

In addition, I am in the process of considering what I want to do professionally, where we will be living, what our life will look like in the next couple of months. And there does not seem to be much clarity now or in the immediate future. 

So basically, I am caught between enjoying vacation mode and preparing for what is next. Above all, I am struggling with figuring out how to take steps out of the vacation mode while still being on vacation.

Don’t get me wrong, I am loving life, just in a very different way than I have been used to the last three years. 

The lesson that I am working with as I am moving through these “troubles in paradise” is the importance of balancing and being present with two opposing states: Rest and Activity.

HERE IS MY THEORY

It is important to only be in one of these states at a time, rest or activity. 

When we are in a state of rest, there can be a tendency to feel guilty about it and, in turn, not be able to fully enjoy it (e.g. being unable to let go of work, phone calls, or email while on vacation). When we are in a state of action, there can be the tendency to procrastinate, avoid work, and feel resentful of it (e.g. losing focus at work or on a project because we wish we were on vacation instead).

In order to combat these tendencies, we have to:

1. Decide which state we are in: action or rest,
2. Really honor and be present in that current state,
3. Create some boundaries around what we are doing and for how long, 
4. And then move out of that state in the appropriate time. 

If we don't do this, we run the risk of burning out from lack of rest, or remaining in a state of passive inaction.

MAKING THE CASE FOR REST

We all know the importance of work and being productive on projects in our life. But our culture doesn’t always honor times of rest. 

There can be a lot of fear in rest. What if I slow down and miss an opportunity? What if I appear weak and lazy? What if I actually become weak and lazy?

But intentional periods of rest are necessary for our health and growth. I think we are starting to understand this. What I am unsure of is our ability to let go of the guilt associated with rest and with taking the time out of our day and lives to care for ourselves. 

As humans, we need rest. When we are injured or our bodies are sore from overuse, the only way to facilitate healing is through rest and inactivity. When we are stressed out, our brains and our internal systems (nervous, digestive, hormonal, etc.) are signaling that we need to take time out from all the noise and busyness in order to let our minds and bodies settle into a more peaceful state.

KNOWING WHEN TO REST AND WHEN TO MOVE

So, in order to implement this lesson and integrate it into my life, I am working on the practice of picking one state to be in at a time and staying present in it. Then, intentionally moving out of it when the time comes. 

As I integrate this into my new vacation schedule, I can already feel a difference in my wellbeing. I am beginning to allow myself to soak up this time of rest and, at the same time, I am getting work done through intentional time of activity (hence, finally getting a blog up).

WHAT ABOUT YOU?

Does this resonate with you at all? Have you ever felt conflicted with balancing rest and getting sh!t done?

Share your strategy, or if you don't have one yet, try this out and let me know what you discover!