Starting over is tough. Restarting, reestablishing, regaining momentum... I feel daunted by all that I have to begin again.
We have moved to a new state, a new city. I am re-envisioning my career path. I am restarting the Happy Heart site after many weeks of silence...
I feel overwhelmed and some of the old fears start to set back in -- will I find purpose; will I do as well as I have done in the past; will I find a community; am I good enough to take on this new stage in my journey?
But what I am reminding myself of is that I am not starting from scratch. I am not starting from nothing. Over the years and the changes I have been through, I have built up many tools and lessons. I have grown so much since the last time I had to "start over."
In reality, I have been starting over since the moment I moved out of my parent's house. When I went to college, when I came back from college, every time I moved or changed jobs, I was starting anew. And I had the choice of what I took with me and what I left behind.
Once again, I am in that state of deciding what I am going to bring with me and what I can let go of as I enter this new phase. And I am more familiar with the process now. So I can let go of the old fears and know that I have all of the experience, strength, and understanding to get through this with more grace than I had the last time around.
I just have to pull from my toolbox of lessons and skills.
Here are the tools and strategies I am using through this change:
- Self-care - patience and care for myself as I go thought the process. I know now that I am not able to just jump into new situations without going through a process of transition. This can involve sadness, excitement, nervousness, and ultimately acceptance of what is happening around me. I am giving myself the space and self-care that I need to go through the process. For more ideas on approaching the idea of self care, check out this article.
- Daily practices - mediation, yoga, and morning pages. They have been my saving grace in the past and this is no exception.
- Trust - trusting that things are going to work out for the best. I understand that there will be challenges and hard lessons along the way, but ultimately, I will grow and evolve from each of the experiences I am faced with.
- Creativity - I need to continue my creative pursuits. My creativity adds more color and purpose to my life. I feel lost with out some sort of creative project.
- Routine - create some sort of structure to my weeks. I do not have a set schedule at the moment but I know that I need some structure in my life in order to feel comfortable. So I am experimenting to figure out some type of routine to my week. I will be flexible with it but knowing that I have it to fall back on lends a great relief when I am stuck wondering what to do with my time. For more on the use of structure to find more freedom, check out this article.
- Positivity and affirmations - turning to positivity to get through the bumpy times. Sometimes it is hard to be positive when there are so many unknowns and so much mystery. But it is an important piece of gracefully moving through change. Not just blind optimism or overly positive affirmations, though… Check out this article that discusses a new approach to using positivity and affirmations in order to get through difficult times and reconnect with who you are deep down.
- Community - finding community makes all the difference. I am not sure how this is going to happen but I know that the most important part of a big move is the community we find. With my move to BA, the community I found was such a huge part of my life. It made all the difference in my experience. So, I know that I have to create a community somehow and I trust that it will happen.
Overall, I believe that the most important piece in starting anew involves jumping in with an open heart. I have let go of any perceived limitations in order to take the first steps into this new life. I have to put myself out there. I cannot let fear and old expectations hold me back.
Most of all, I cannot let perfect be the enemy of good.
Don't get me wrong, sometimes we do have to take the time to step back and review with a critical eye where we are, what we want to do, and what value we are adding to the world. But if we spend all of our time reviewing and not taking any action, we remain stagnant. We get paralyzed by indecision. We get overwhelmed by the possibilities and the "what if's," and life ends up passing us by.
Ultimately, we will not find the right path standing still. We have to take steps in SOME direction and then listen to the feedback. Only then will we know whether to hold course or set a new direction. We have to move and the universe will move with us. We have to give the universe something to work with, something to guide. So, here goes.
What about you?
Do you have any tips or tricks that you use to get though change and starting over in life? Whether it is a big move, a small move, a change in jobs or relationships -- what do you call on to keep you moving forward through change?
Please add a comment below sharing your thoughts and strategies so we call all build our collective tool kit. <3