I woke up the other morning and realized that I am feeling off. I can feel emotions beneath the surface that I am not letting bubble up. For one, I am feeling super sensitive — if something small happens or goes wrong, I feel like I am on the brink of tears. For another, I am noticing the signs of stress in my body but not letting the feeling seep into my mind. This makes me realize that I am more stressed out than I am letting on. It is like I am trying to hide it from myself. I focus on what is going well and try to ignore the signs of despair.

My first reaction when faced with these “under the surface emotions,” so to speak, is confusion — not understanding what is going on or what to do about it. Then, once I finally went back to writing morning pages for the first time in over a week, I began to process and admit what is going on.